You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Randomize
