Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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