Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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