Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Randomize
