I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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