I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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