I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
