my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
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