glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
