I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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