I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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