Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
