who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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