glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
