Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
