dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize