Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
