on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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