my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize