I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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