Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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