You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
