oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
my nose is crying tears of wow.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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