she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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