oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
