Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
