And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
