So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize