We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
