so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Shame is for Republicans.
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