so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
