Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Your shirt... Was in my pants
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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