You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
