Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
