Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Randomize