matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
