It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I have fence marks all over my body
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Randomize
