we're chasing vodka with high fives
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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