bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
