WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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