..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize