he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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