we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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