maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize
