We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
