I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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