I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
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