OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
