when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
The power of my boobs compel you
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
