Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
