and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
