Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
