I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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