I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
